Wednesday, January 31, 2007


Song to the tune of my favorite things.....(probably only Lori and my mom will get this one ;) )

Lori Jill C....K dear daughter of Aaron

New Jersey mother and stuffed bear baron

Sister of Wendi and daughter of Joyce

Heidi S......z surely made you her choice

Three lovely ladies you raise in your house

One handsome husband who is surely no louse

This song's been song over 30 years

Oh my god Lori your laughing thru tears

It's pretty crazy and so hazy how these years flew by

One minute we're 18 now Hay Syd are tweens

At least Addie's still wetting her pants!!!

Happy Birthday my beautiful and most loving and special sister! Your are truly the best friend anyone can have and I love you with all my heart for all you have done for me. You are going to be the best Aunt ever to your niece Lia Rose!

(Just so everyone gets the joke, when I was 13 and Bat Mitzvahed a wonderful man named Robert H wrote a song to celebrate my Bat Mitzvah. It was to the tune of "My Favorite things." Now on every special occasion...including my wedding, wedding shower and 40th birthday, a song is written by my sister to me ....the above is my weak attempt at doing it for her. By the way, Hayley and Sydney-wait to you see what we sing to you at your Bat Mitzvah!)

What to expect


I realized that through this whole adoption story that I am wrapped up in, there is one thing I haven't spent much time thinking about. I have researched, read, searched the web, networked with others and pulled my hair out about everything having to do with adoption and with adopting Chinese babies in particular. One of the things I haven't really spent much time doing or really focusing on is the fact that I have no idea of what the heck to do when this little person enters my life. Thankfully my husband, sister, mother, father and several very close friends have been there done there when it comes to parenting a baby/ however, nothing! I know that my stepdaughter and nieces will surely have words of advice for me, but quite frankly, they have never raised a toddler, just have been one more recently then me. Anyway, I decided to get smart about this, and considering I have another year or so to wait, I bought the above book today. It's over 800 pages and I learned tonite that it's o'k for toddlers to toddle and fall!!!! Happy reading to me!

Tuesday, January 30, 2007


Somewhere in China there sits a woman, I imagine her being pregnant. Her belly filling up with love and baby. She feels the little flutter of her baby as she moves inside of her. She sees movement when she lies down at nite. Does she have cravings? Does she get tired ? Is she scared about what the future of this baby inside of her will be? Somewhere in China is a woman who has my daughter inside of her. Does she know how grateful I am to her? Does she know that because of her love for her daughter, my dreams of being a mommy will come true? Does she cry at nite? Does she moan for the loss of this baby that she knows will inevitably happen as soon as she gives birth? Does she know how much I love her?

Monday, January 29, 2007

Can't sleep

I can't sleep, so I am blogging....again...a second post in one day. This one will have absolutely nothing to do with adoption...I thought I'd ask the blog world for help, and in doing so totally embarrass by wonderful sister, the lovely and hysterically daughter to be's...Aunt beautiful, and I mean that, younger sister is turning 43 on February 1st. I have no idea what to get I thought I'd ask??? Any suggestions??? Let me know!!!! And I know some of her friends are reading your ideas are especially welcome!!!!

Various stuff....

It's the end of another month, and the rumors are running rampant about new referrals. Remember, we are still matching people with Log In's from ' we have a ways to go before we are into the '06 batch. Everyday people ask me "when is the baby coming"...I keep trying to explain, "I really don't know"'s just truly a waiting game right now. Picture a big big pile of files and we are at the very bottom of day soon to be at the top. Every month we wait for a speed up in referrals, and every month, at least since I have been really paying attention, there hasn't been one. I can't wait to be able to post..."Speed Up...finally." Next week I may attend a seminar with Rose, one of the lovely ladies in my Dossier Group. There are actually three of us, three couples that is, who's Dossier's all went to China on the same day. It's so incredible that the three of us have the a similar situation...we are all older couples, first time moms and live within in 60 minutes (or so) of each other. We email often but have yet to meet. Hopefully next week Rose and I can hook up. The Seminar is being sponsored by the Asia Society and it will address the future of the Chinese adoption program. In March I am attending another all day seminar with my adoption pal Ann Marie ( The seminar is all about International Adoption issues, from attachment to health issues. It should be very enlighting. Anyway, my days are so busy lately with work that I have limited time to worry about how long this is taking....a blessing in a small way, probably a big way.
And I do have Annie is back in Aussie doing what she does best, shopping! I am so proud of my stepdaughter...she certainly knows her way around a mall!!!

Sunday, January 28, 2007

Alone again

Between Joe's hip surgery in November and then having my stepchildren here, my house was filled with activity and people! With Joe at work this morning, and all day yesterday, it's the first time in a long long time, that I've been completely alone. Well, Molly my dog is with me, but I mean with other humans. I, unlike many, have had many many times in my life where I was alone. I married "later in life" and spent many a weekend in my little walk-up apartment on the Upper West Side of Manhattan completely by myself. In fact, years ago, with no computer to play on, I have no idea what I used to do. I think I must have watched alot of television! This morning I actually took an hour long walk. I really needed it. I love to get my exercise, and I have to admit, I've been really bad at making sure I do. One of the commmittments I am truly making to myself over the next few months, is to really get back into that part of my life. I realized my birthday is just around the corner in April, and it's the biggest number I've had to face yet. In fact, I'm going to be closer to the big 50 then the big 40! It goes fast. Knowing that I am going to be a mother is making me not feel "that" old, so it's even more important to get this body in great shape! I am hoping by spring Joe will be ready to take some long walks with me too....not only for exercise, but to actually spend time together. Isn't it crazy that married couples are so busy working and taking care of "stuff" that it's hard just to actually be together.

Before the kids came, I put away all of Lia's stuff into a drawer. Not that I have that much stuff, but what I do was put away. I didn't want to have it in their faces -this news is just brand new to them and I want to give them time. Anyway, now that Annie has gone back home, I pulled Lia's stuff back out. I hung the few items that I have up in the closet. It makes me feel good to just look at it, and remember, that this adoption is real.

And, most importantly, Annie is home, safe and sound! Apparently out shopping already!!! That's my girl!

Saturday, January 27, 2007


Yes it's true, today marks exactly three months since log in! Once again, I am not going to focus on how many more months ahead of us...first off, I have no idea, and secondly I made a blog promise to the cyber world that I would not complain and focus on that! But, it is cool to see time moving ahead and the clock tick away the step-daughter Annie should be home by now, and I'm hoping we get some sort of email or call to let us know she is o'k. I already miss that kid, and the house is strangely quiet since she has gone. I was at the Bagel Buffet today and I really missed having my side-kick have her Bagel with Bacon and egg sandwich. What I won't miss is the daily french fries aka chips that she ordered that I tended to sneak one or two. This isn't the way I like to eat....but it sure was good. I love you Annie as big as the world!!!! In other news, I had lunch this week with a client of the radio station where I work, Mel, who is Chinese. We went to this delicious Chinese restaurant called Chin Chin. Probably the best chinese food I have ever had. Mel was awesome as she spent a good hour and a half really given me some interesting information about Chinese history and customs. I have made a promise to myself and to Lia to learn as much as I can about her culture, so I can share with her as she grows up. She will always be Chinese first and foremost, and I intend to celebrate that with her! My Aunt Helen is still very ill....she continues to be in my prayers. Anyway , that is my update for today....time to do the wash!!!!

Friday, January 26, 2007

Thank you Heather

How cool is my new design???? The lovely Heather ( "pimped" this up for me!!!!! I love love love it!!!!! Thank you Heather!!!!

My first daughter

Annie just left....just walked out the door to catch her plane back to
Aussie. It's 6am and we are sad but , how lucky am I to have the greatest stepdaughter in the world. Not only really beautiful, but sweet and special. I pray for to get home safely back to Australia...and I can't wait to hold her again!!!!

Monday, January 22, 2007

From the top of the Mountains

We went to Vermont this weekend. Joe had promised Annie she would see snow! And boy did was so utterly breathtaking up there. Cold beyond words for a skinny gal from Australia. But she had a ball playing in the snow, and even getting a ride on a snow mobile! Not sure she appreciated the beauty as much as we did, but the view of Vermont from the top of Stratton Mountain (yes, we went up, and came down on the ski lift! No we don't ski)it was incredible. I felt like I was in the North Pole.
We stayed in a lovely motel outside of the mountain called Manchester. I saw the stars really shine there. At one point, I got really dizzy and light headed while looking at them. A feeling came over me I can't explain it. I will mark this down now, but I think Lia may have been born this weekend or maybe conceived. I know it sounds nuts, but I do cling onto this hope that I can have this deep connection with her. A mom can hope....

Thursday, January 18, 2007

4 Little Daughters

Although I am not officially a mommy, I do have to say that I have actually four daughters already. Daughters who I want only the best for, who I love unconditionally. Little women who make my heart swell when I think of them, and who I believe think the world of me. I list them in alphabetical order with a few words besides their name to describe what think of when I think of them....
Addison( my niece)-Adorable, lovable, huggable, delicious, hysterically funny, a little "yenta", a dream come true
Annie (my stepdaughter)-Beautiful, outstanding, sweet, respectful, responsible, a step mothers oldest daughter, great friend, a love
Hayley(my niece)-Adventuresome, outgoing, beautiful, fearless, demanding, brilliant, my first love, my buddy
Sydney(my niece)-Sweet, delicious, a little version of my sister, sensitive, cutting, observant, tells it like it is, beautiful, the best snuggler in the world.....the love of my life
I am so lucky and blessed to have my daughters....Lia will be the fifth and be so lucky to have her older sisters!

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Ramblings of a tired woman

It's been a busy few days, and I haven't been blogging.....first off, my aunt is still not, that has been weighing on my mind. I don't know how to put into words what I am feeling. I don't want to offend anyone in my life. But this is my blog, and it's a place that I come to share my feelings and my thoughts. You see, one day, my daughter can read this and learn a little about me. What I was thinking and feeling in the months leading up to her birth. If I come off emotional at times, it's really o'k. This is a safe place where I choose to do so. The people that are reading this are in two groups....1. My friends and family who love me 2. Other Waiting families and adoptive parents who are going thru similar experiences. Having the comfort of those going thru similar experiences is something I can't put a price on. It's invaluable to me. The way I share with my new friends in the "adoption" word is so healthy and truly priceless.
Going thru this "pregnancy" is very much like a biological pregnancy. There are obvious difference, mainly weight gain and an exact number of weeks till baby day....but the emotions and the excitement is the same. Whether it's 9 months or 18 months....knowing your going to be a mother. Imagining what your child will be like. Comparing notes with other "expectant"'s all the same. My sister Lori said it best, no one really understands either way! And she is so very right.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

My Aunt Helen

My Aunt Helen is my father's sister. She is very very ill tonite. We aren't sure if she is going to make it and I feel, of course, very sad about it. In the last few years I really tried to reconnect with her. I knew she was up there in age, and I wanted to have some special memories of her. I am so glad that we shared those phone conversations and emails. She really opened up to me in a way that many her age have not. Aunt Helen was so excited when I got married. She herself had recently remarried and she compared the love she has with her husband George with the love that "Joseph" (as she called him) and I share. Aunt Helen was one of the first people I shared my news about the adoption of Lia Rose. She was over the top happy for me, and said so many many times. In fact, and she was dead serious, she told me how she discussed with her husband that she, too, would like to adopt a daughter from China. I gently tried to explain to her that at 80 years plus, that might not be that easy, but it was a wonderful and generous thought. Aunt Helen shared with me that she had a lot of sadness when she was growing up but had found such happiness in her life in her later years. Every email and phone conversation ended with a G-d bless you Wendi. Tonite, I ask G-d, please bless my Aunt Helen.

The Mols

When you are a childless woman, you find that treat your dog like your child! These are some pictures of the very cute and very spoiled Molly! We adore this doggie...a Tibetan terrier that we "adopted" from an Animal Shelter in Manhattan almost four years ago. She is the snuggliest, cutest, most loving dog I have ever met. I had two other doggies before her, Amber and Casey. I lived with the two of them in my fourth floor walk up in NYC. They had been left homeless because there owner had died, and I rescued them. They were both over seven years old, and I had them with me for about four years until they both passed away. Probably was crazy for a single working woman in Manhattan (at the time) to have two doggies so old...but, I thought it was the right thing to do at the time.....After Joe and I were engaged, and he was here living with me, we decided to get a dog...and lucky us, we found "The Mols" Molly!!!! Now, my sister Lori tells me that after Lia is with us we won't find Molly at all that cute anymore! I just don't buy into that (smile!).

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Wow....profound words from my niece Addie

The latest entry on my five year old almost six year old niece's Addie's blog-pretty awesome....

I slept so much Lia came out of Aunt Wendi's belly :). That was totally wierd. I was so happy. It was a Chinese baby that came out of her real mommy's belly in China. China is far far away. And people don't talk like in our language. She should take her to a Chinese restaurant so she can know what Chinese things are like. If you have a Chinese baby that you adopted, you must care and love your baby, just like if it came out of your belly. It's hard to believe that so many people had girls instead of boys. Sometimes you're happy, sometimes you're sad. Whether or not you don't have to have one or you can!The moms get kind of sad, they cry, because they miss their babies. They never see them grown up they only see them when they come out of the moms belly. That's the only day. You must not let your baby have candy. They will choke and get very sick. It's hard to be a mother, when you have a baby.The end.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

What's up

I felt like I haven' t written lately....been busy and tired. I love having Annie here! Right now, Joe and Annie are cuddled up on the couch talking. They have a wonderful relationship. Annie is just the sweetest. The only problem is she won't let me kiss her. (smile) She came to work with me last week, and did a terrific job. I had her do a big mailing for me. She is coming tomororow as well, to finish that mailing. Last weekend we had dinner with my friend Alice and her 4 year old Olivia. Olivia kept asking me how I was having a baby if the baby wasn't in my tummy. I explained to her that my baby was in my heart, and she was being born in China to another mommy. Then I was going to bring her home to us to be her Forever Mommy. On Sunday nite, Annie and I went to see TARZAN on Broadway. (Great show). We were joined by my friend Marcia and her 5 year old Chinese daughter Catarina. (They are in the process of adopting #2) I'll post photos soon...but it was so special to see Annie and her together. Catarina adored Annie. I kept imagining what the future will look like. This weekend I'm going to meet one of my adoption friends Christine and her daughters (adopted from China). She is in the process of adopting #3. All these great great's just wonderful to have all of this great support and company! So besides having cravings tonite for Chinese food and chocolate.....I'm doing o'k...having Annie with us certainly is keeping me busy. I think I learned one of my first lessons in mommy-hood last nite. I was really tired, and I just wanted to come home from work, get a glass of wine and get in bed. Annie wanted to cuddle and watch television with would have been easy to say, good nite....but I remembered, " Wendi you are the mom" I hung out with her , and went to sleep a bit later. It was wonderful and this is what it's all about!!!! If you are reading and haven't commented, please do...I love to know who is checking us out....even though sometimes I feel that this is a bit self-serving, and some in my family can't believe how open I am is a wonderful escape for me. And I love the fact that I can share like this...and that so many are keeping us in their thoughts. The bottom line is that in 15 years, I want Lia to read this blog and see how she was so loved and cared about even before she was in my arms.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

CNN thoughts, what are yours?

I did not see Friday's show until last nite. ( I had read transcripts) They were very smug that nite. I got the impression they thought they were trying to be humorous. It was terrible.I do give credit to CNN for re-addressing the issue last nite and admitting publically that they had received numerous(thousands) of complaints. I felt that David from FCC was good...I would have liked to see him debate the panelists, especially Roland, who I felt to be incredibly arrogant....he just angers me. Anyway, the reality is, not all people understand what we are doing. I remember telling some business friends about our adoption, and they started joking that I was trying to be like Angelina Jolie. Why wasn't I getting my African child? Not everyone is nice. Not everyone is open minded to different kinds of families. Not everyone sees things the way that I do. That is the big lesson I am learning through this. I can critize CNN all I want. But that won't change the fact that there are millions of people out there, with millions of opinions and ideas of what is right for them. At this point I am going to do my best to protect my family from attacks, and work towards hopefully opening the minds of those that don't understand.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Note to me from CNN

Thanks very much for your email concerning the segment “China Tightens Foreign Adoption Regulations” that aired on Paula Zahn Now on Friday, January 5th. We value your feedback and want to make sure you have the information about our upcoming continued reports on this subject.
Tonight’s Paula Zahn NOW will again address the new rules for foreign adoptions of Chinese children. The coverage will include a new report by CNN’s John Vause in Beijing , China . Paula will be joined by a number of guests to discuss the issue, including David Youtz, President of the Greater NY Chapter of “Families With Children From China”, and Ginny Gong, President of the “Organization of Chinese Americans”.
Again, thank you for taking the time to express your opinion, and please tune in for this follow up report.
CNN Public Information

Friday, January 05, 2007


I can't get into it now because I have a headache, but CNN jsut proved to me tonite how filthy journalism can be. I am so disappointed and will never watch them again. The had a discussion tonite on Paula Zahn about the Chinese rule ended up being a discussion about why people adopt from China. A discussion including a panel of "experts" who had no idea what they were talking about. Not one was an adoptive parent. In a nutshell, they made us out to be racists for not adopting domestic African American children and claim that the only reason we adopt chinese children are because they are pretty and smart! I am so angry you have no idea. I am going to sleep now. My head is throbbing. How dare them!

An off topic moment

Women with PMS demonstrate better memory skills
Posted: Dec 31st 2006 7:15AM Filed y under: Women's Health
There's always a silver lining, right? Women who suffer from premenstrual syndrome rarely have anything good to say about it, but now it appears that there may be a benefit to having the disorder -- better memory and increased awareness. that explains it!!!!

Thursday, January 04, 2007


O'k, I look horrible in this...truly, and my mother will wonder what posting this has to do with the adoption of Lia...but it's a moment in time, and a funny moment that I want to share with all my Blogmates and with my daughter one day in the future...thanks to my sister for the wonderful least I can kinda of carry a tune...but the bags under my eyes..oy vey! Enjoy!!!

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Referral day

CCAA matched up until 9/27/05..not 06..enough said...but the great news is my friend Frances from England got her referral...a beautiful little girl, she is 17 months year from Hunan. She is naming her Zoe and she is beautiful....congrats!!!! I am so excited for you...tonite, Joe, Annie, and I exchanged red bracelets...these are red threads that we will keep on our wrists until Lia comes...well hopefull they will last that long.'s our connection! We are all so excited.... Annie was a mother's helper today to friends' daughter. She is so great with babies...I can not wait until she is playing with our Lia Rose...her Mei Mei.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Stork Alert

Looks like the next batch of referrals are coming in! These start from September 9, 2005 thru ??? And that is the big question...hopefully they can get thru all of September. My friend Frances who I have been chatting with online is getting hers!!!! I am so excited for her !!! Good luck to all!!!!