Thursday, December 28, 2006
The good and the bad
Sometimes situations aren't always perfect. You wonder here in the Blogosphere, where your life is an open book, how much do u share? What do u leave out? Tonite, I share with you that I had a difficult time with my stepson.....he was in a mood, and basically let it out on me. I felt so hurt that I asked my husband for the nite off....which he gave me. I cried. I cried deeply. Not only about the circumstance between Adam and I (which had nothing to do with Lia for those of you wondering), but I cried deeply for the fact that you try so hard to love someone and do right ,and sometimes, right isn't always the right way for someone. And I cried for Lia. My baby...who I needed so much tonite. That feeling of unconditional love. The feeling of total forgiveness...I wanted it as mother from my child. It was not to be had tonite.....and I ache for her so very much. the situation between Adam and I will pass....he is a growing up, and misses his dad, and is just going thru that stage of thinking he is a man, but is not quite there yet. I prayed for him to find some peace tonite. For forgiveness and for happiness.
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Wendi, You were so right to ask to take the night off...away from the entire family. And you were prepared for this, huh? Those kiddies, ESPECIALLY older ones, can break your heart. Remember that they are just trying to show their independence. Hey, you were there not too long ago! Probably did not act anywhere near like what you are getting. There are dynamics with the divorce AND the current times that we never knew, so we cannot imagine that we know anything like what they are feeling. Your step-son is most likely lashing out at you since it is too risky for him to direct any of it toward his dad.
Girls will do it too! I had not seen my daughter since Aug 15, and since she started college, etc, and first thing yesterday, she started critisizing, oh, mom, you are so strange, OK, I said mean things to my mom too, but eventually you interpret it as "I didn't realize how much I missed you, and now that I see you again, and we have both changed some, I am sad for what I have missed..."
Good book to read, especially for the teen girls but also applies to boys, GET OUT OF MY LIFE, but first take me & Cheryl to the mall.
Last advice: take yourself to the mall, or with your nieces, or to a movie with friends. You are a person too, and your stepkids need time alone with their dad.
And remember: millions of parents & step-parents have been through this: why can't we? We CAN!!..but there will be/is pain along with the joy.
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