Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Final stages of labor?

From my neck to my feet I hurt. Every bone aches. My back is killing me. I sleep at night and wake up in pain. I carry alot around with me everyday...laptops, projectors, boxes filled with stuff for my workshops. I know that I lift to much at times. I think between that and my general state of anxiety right now, I'm knocked out. Really in pain.

It hurts more at the end. Right before you get to your goal. The final lap around the track. The final mile in a marathon. As you get closer, you know it's real and you know it's almost over, and you are just not quite there yet. It hurts. You push, you push, you just want to exhale but you aren't quite there yet. That is how I feel this morning. So almost there, but just not quite. And it does hurt. It's almost over. I can breathe soon. The watched pot doesn't boil. I need to stop thinking of this, but how can I? Soon soon. In the meantime, I'll take a tylenol and try to relax.

1 comment:

KJ said...

take a deep breathe, a Tylenol, and try to relax. i know it can't be easy - but you are right... i think it does hurt more in the end. i know this has NOTHING to do w adopting a child ... and I know your pain is WAY more intense as you are waiting for your DAUGHTER, but when I was training for my marathon and it started to hurt really bad, I remembered a coach saying, "you dont think michael phelps was in pain every race he swam?" For some reason, that sentiment kept me going ... kept me focused on a goal. Lia is WAY MORE than a "goal" - but that also means she is WAY MORE worth the pain. I am not a mom, so don't exactly know what I am talking about ... but I have a funny feeling this "pain" will be the last thing you think about when you hold that little girl in your arms. I love you... sending hugs and kisses.